Posted by: dreamofdestiny | Friday, 26 Jun 2009


Year of Reckoning / June

Recovering has been slow and painful over the past few months. This month, I can feel that things may start looking brighter. Like, at least, I can see myself recovering. I hardly think about it anymore. I can see myself going through my daily activities like this is really my body I am inside. It does feel good to reconnect with who I am, before all this started. I have sacrificed too much, and gained nothing n return. In fact, I lost many things, but the worse part was that I lost myself in all those madness.

‘They’ say that all is fair in love and war. If you have gone through a major heartache, would you still agree with that statement. Even in war, there are rules; should that not be the same for love? I do not know, I am certainly not ‘they’.

Regardless, I can safely say that all of that is behind me now. There are new beginnings to explore. And that began early in the month, when I got a very good call, an extremely good call, one I have been waiting for about five weeks, I think. I will not go into details here, too early for any kind of confirmation, but if this turns out to be good, then of course, I will slightly mention about it.

This month, the highlight had to be the plan to meet up with someone I have been looking forward to. And I had plan this for months, for us to meet up, that is why I was there for such a long holiday.

I have been getting to know someone very special to me. She is the only one I do not have a definite nickname though thus far. Wait, that is not really correct, of course I do. But it is different. Different in a way that I rarely encounter situations where I am on the receiving end of something, if you get my meaning. That is what makes all of this special. The chance to really immerse myself in the feeling of being loved by someone unconditionally. That has to be lovely right.

Yes, this is the same special someone I have only briefly mentioned in past posts. And it is really not fair. This person has been with me through all my struggles since last year. Through happy and bad times. Though far, we share a common bond. It is only recently that I began to realise that I care for her more so than I originally thought, and I want to pursue it.

Six months have passed. Half a year. This seems like a good as time for a new beginning.


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